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"One More Minute"
by Weird Al Yankovic
from
the album
Dare To Be Stupid
1985
Well, I heard that you're leavin'
Gonna leave me far behind
'Cause you found a brand new lover
You decided that I'm not your kind
So I pulled your name out of my Rolodex
And I tore all your pictures in two
And I burned down the malt shop where we used to go
Just because it reminds me of you
That's right, you ain't gonna see me cryin'
I'm glad that you found somebody new
'Cause I'd rather spend eternity eating shards of broken glass
Than spend one more minute with you
I guess I might seem kinda bitter
You got me feelin' down in the dumps
'Cause I'm stranded all alone in the Gas Station of Love
And I have to use the self-service pumps
Oh, so honey, let me help you with that suitcase
You ain't gonna break my heart in two
'Cause I'd rather get a hundred thousand paper cuts on my face
Than spend one more minute with you
I'd rather rip out my intestines with a fork
Than watch you going out with other men
I'd rather slam my fingers in a door
Again and again and again and again and again
Aw, can't you see what I'm tryin' to say, darlin'
I'd rather have my blood sucked out by leeches
Shove an ice pick under a toenail or two
I'd rather clean all the bathrooms in Grand Central Station with my
tongue
Than spend one more minute with you
Yes, I'd rather jump naked on a huge pile of thumbtacks
Or stick my nostrils together with Krazy Glue
I'd rather dive into a swimming pool filled with double-edged razor
blades
Than spend one more minute with you
I'd rather rip my heart right out of my rib cage with
my bare hands
And then throw it on the floor and stomp on it till I die...
Than spend one more minute with you
Lyrics © 1985 Al Yankovic